The Great Debate: Insta-glam vs French Glam
“There are two types of people in the world *cue Britney Spears music*: the ones who sport Instagram brows and the ones that... well, observe.”
— amaya oswald
Moi? I am someone who observes the limacine-like monstrosities as they perch above somebody’s poor, undeserving brow bone, ready to lurch upwards as soon as their facial muscles direct them to.
Just kidding! While I’m not a huge fan of Instagram makeup personally, I understand its appeal and appreciate its presence in the beauty world. It’s no secret that some of the most creative and colorful looks have been generated from highly talented Instagram and Youtube makeup artists. However, my personal style of makeup leans more “French,” as they like to say — natural-looking, light, and glittery. Of course, if there was a spectrum of makeup, French-style makeup and Instagram makeup would be at opposite ends of the scale, and recently, I’ve been pondering over which style is objectively “better.” So, acting as a totally non-biased makeup referee *wink* weighing up the best candidacies for beauty world’s president, I’ve considered each style of makeup and pointed out the crippling weaknesses of each.
1. Instagram Makeup Is Something Very Few People Would Wear Out Of The House
Despite the fact that people seem to be overly confident with their eyebrows these days, everything else about Instagram makeup seems to be reserved for HD cameras. Heavy slicks of foundation and setting powder, layers of eyeshadow that can settle into the creases of your eyelids — it was all too much for that random person you accidentally ran your cart into at Costco. Too bad that they dropped their milk cartoon on the floor when they screamed and ran out of the store.
2. Sometimes, People Don’t Even Know You’re Wearing Makeup When You Do It French-Style
I regret to inform you all that as a French-style makeup wearer, there have been a few occasions when people have thought I was wearing no makeup at all. This may seem like a positive thing, but honestly, French-style makeup takes too much work for no one to be able to see it on my face.
3. Nothing Is More Frustrating Than Putting Loose Baking Powder Under Your Cheekbone And Along The Jawline
Someone decided one day that putting ultra white loose powder under your cheekbone was mandatory. If you’re someone who is trying to enhance the structure of your jawline, this doesn’t seem like a bad idea. On the other hand, if you’re someone who wants to possess an awkwardly shaped jaw because putting contour isn’t your first language, like I do all the time, this is an Instagram makeup trend you should consider skipping out on.
4. What Is The Point Of Foundation If It Is Translucent *looking at you, Glossier*
Okay, I am a huge hypocrite here. I own two bottles of Glossier’s skin tint and I have a third currently sitting in my cart — but if we’re truly being honest with ourselves, there are some days that we want that clear skin ““tint”” to be more than just a tint. Give me another reason to buy, than to look like I’ve just smeared a tub of Vaseline on my face. (But, boy oh boy, does that “smeared vaseline look — look so good, ???)
I’m exhausted, it’s 2:30 AM, and after weighing up our options here, I have yet to decide whether Instagram makeup or French-style makeup has won this debate. I guess we’ll see you next time, Instagram and French, in the primaries.
